The most selfish one-letter word - "I" ... Avoid it.
The most satisfying two-letter word - "WE" ... Use it.
The most poisonous three-letter word - "EGO" ... Kill it.
The most used four-letter word - "LOVE" ... Value it.
The most pleasing five-letter word - "SMILE" ... Keep it.
The fastest spreading six-letter word - "RUMOUR" ... Ignore it.
The hard working seven-letter word - "SUCCESS" ... Achieve it.
The most enviable eight-letter word - "JEALOUSY" ... Distance it.
The most powerful nine-letter word - "KNOWLEDGE" ... Acquire it.
The most divine ten-letter word - "FRIENDSHIP" ... Treasure it.
Use these words into your everyday speech
• Discover, (instead of find)
• Good
• Money
• Easy (rather than simple)
• Guaranteed (rather than promise)
• Health (rather than fitness)
• Love (rather than like)
• Proven (rather than right)
• Results
• Safe (rather than secure or secret)
• Save rather than (protect)
• Own (rather than buy)
• Fair (rather than reasonable)
• Better
• Best
• Improve ( rather than "change")
• Now (rather than today)
• Learn
• Science (scientific)
• Immediate (immediately)
• You/You
You can discover and learn how much of these nice words used in these wonderful sayings, which make us better persons.
“If ever there is tomorrow when we're not together.. there is something you must always remember. you are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think. but the most important thing is, even if we're apart.. i'll always be with you.”
Winnie the Pooh
“I love you not because of who you are, but because of who I am when I am with you.”
Roy Croft
“We all take different paths in life, but no matter where we go, we take a little of each other everywhere.”
“Be not angry that you cannot make others as you wish them to be, since you cannot make yourself as you wish to be.”
Thomas Kempis
“The strongest influences in my life and my work are always whomever I love. Whomever I love and am with most of the time, or whomever I remember most vividly. I think that's true of everyone, don't you?”
Tennessee Williams
“Sometimes you put walls up not to keep people out, but to see who cares enough to break them down.”
“If you live to be 100, I hope I live to be 100 minus 1 day, so I never have to live without you.”
Winnie the Pooh
“Truly great friends are hard to find, difficult to leave, and impossible to forget.”
“Love is when two people know everything about eachother and are still friends.”
“What is uttered from the heart alone, Will win the hearts of others to your own.”
Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
“A friend is someone who understands your past, believes in your future, and accepts you just the way you are.”
Influencing people through Word-of-mouth is not a nitche,
people talk about you when you are not there online or off-line.
Most people fail to plan for it. Social Networks exsist in every place, use them.
Five ways you can influence people to do it
Up, Up And Away – Going Way BeyondOne of the best ways to get people talking good things about you give them more than they expect. Give them something to talk about. Word of mouthcan be a double edged sword in that if you fail to meet those expectations the word-of-mouth received will be negative.
Give them something good.
Don’t Go Faceless – Show Your Personality
What is the personality of you to the people that make it up? What are your stories and what makes them unique? Answer those questions and make sure to put it out there for people to see. Have you made a video why you do your kind of work? It’s okay to get personal because that’s what you want, you want your personality to shine. The idea is to create something that people want to be part of.
Correcting Mistakes – Listening To What They Are Saying
It’s okay to make mistakes, as we all do. Things will always crop up! It’s how you fix those mistakes differentiate you from the competition and get people talking. The first rule is to not let the negative stuff people may say about you to make you down. Look at them as a way to improve and a way to stand out. Take what they to your heart to improve by integrating the negatives and turn them into positives. Be concerned about them as a part of your day to day processes to ensure that it doesn’t happen again.
Making Connections – Staying ConnectedConnect with people online, go to where they they go, and get to know them. Connect physically. Build relationships that go beyond business enabling to influence people to talk about you and your work. Such relationships boost your business by increasing repeat referrals you receive.
Give, Give, Give – Work on PhilanthropyEvery person should be doing this as a part of life activities. Keep in mind that charity does not mean that you have to donate money. Help people with your knowledge, give away used stuff.
Plan For Word-Of-MouthInclude it as part of your social strategy, plan for it, to find your way into your customers social graph. Take a look at your processes and integrate the information in this post into them. Creating information delivery channel with websites, news letters, exceptional customer service, developing personality, correcting mistakes, connecting with people and being philanthropic.
“Start out with an ideal and end up with a deal.”
Karl Albrecht, co-founder of Aldi.
Before meeting someone or even writing an e mail or making a phone call
- Know what you want. Sit down and work out exactly:
- What you need and what want.
- Ask for the needs first and negotiate with the wants
- How much you can afford
- How far you’re prepared to compromise on both (afford vs. spend)
Consider new ideas and make sure you understand the pros and cons, and find out if you can ‘mix and match’ elements of various options.
Don’t be rushed into anything. If you’re happy with something, get them to draw up the paperwork and tell them you’ll be back in a day or two.
At the very least, you should read the small print and ‘sleep on it’.
Don’t feel pressured. You can always walk away from the deal. If you’re not impressed with the ‘final offer’, thank people for their time and say you need to look elsewhere.
Learn to COMPROMISE at the very end. Then you always win
If you are dealing with people from banks/government/insitution and a general tip is to understand their mentality, become who they are.
SuggestionsDon't tell people what to do, offer them suggestions, people respond more to fear than normal action, because once action commences one rarely steps down.
It is a great technique to just offer suggestions. If you need a person's help and that person usually has moral reservations, you need to offer them something useful, an information, link of a website that would help him of his work would be fine.
Basic influencing includes understanding the mindset of your mark, earning their respect.
And sometimes no matter what you do, you will fail to convince a person, so what option do you have? Convince anorther preson to convince them. A friend of them, a superrior can help you influence them.
Read the book
How to win and influence people by Dale Carnagie
Control your temper. Remember, you can measure the size of a person by what makes him or her angry.
Three-fourths of the people you will ever meet are hungering and thirsting for sympathy.
Give it to them, and they will love you.
Remember that
a person's name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language.
Ask questions instead of giving direct orders and comments.
The unvarnished truth is that almost all the people you meet feel themselves superior to you in some way, and a sure way to their hearts is to let them realize in some subtle way that you
recognize their importance, and recognize it sincerely.
Talk about
your own mistakes before criticizing the other person.
Everybody in the world is seeking
happiness - and there is one sure way to find it. That is by controlling your thoughts. Happiness doesn't depend on outward conditions. It depends on inner conditions.
Let us
praise even the slightest improvement. That inspires the other person to keep on improving.
Make the
other person feel important - and do it sincerely.
There is one all-important law of human conduct. If we obey that law, we shall almost never get into trouble. In fact, that law, if obeyed, will bring us countless friends and constant happiness. But the very instant we break the law, we shall get into endless trouble. The law is this: Always make the other person feel important.
Whenever you go out-of-doors, draw the chin in, carry the crown of the head high, and fill the lungs to the utmost; drink in the sunshine;
greet your friends with a smile, and put soul into every handclasp. Do not fear being misunderstood and do not waste a minute thinking about your enemies. Try to fix firmly in your mind what you would like to do; and then, without veering off direction, you will move straight to the goal. Keep your mind on the great and splendid things you would like to do, and then, as the days go gliding away, you will find yourself unconsciously seizing upon the opportunities that are required for the fulfillment of your desire. Advice from Elbert Hubbard
When dealing with people, let us remember we are not dealing with creatures of logic. We are dealing with
creatures of emotion, creatures bristling with prejudices and motivated by pride and vanity.
Let the
other person do a great deal of the talking.
If you disagree with someone you may be tempted to interrupt. But don't. It is dangerous. They won't pay attention to you while they still have a lot of ideas of their own crying for expression. So
listen patiently and with an open mind.
You will never get into trouble by admitting that you may be wrong. That will stop all argument and
inspire your opponent to be just as fair and open and broad-minded as you are. It will make him want to admit that he, too, may be wrong.
Wouldn't you like to have a magic phrase that would stop arguments, eliminate ill feeling, create good will, and make the other person listen attentively? Yes? All right. Here it is: "I
don't blame you for feeling as you do. If I were you I would undoubtedly feel just as you do."
So the only way on earth to influence other people is to talk about
what they want and show them how to get it.
You can tell people they are wrong by a look or an intonation or a gesture just as eloquently as you can in words - and if you tell them they are wrong, do you make them want to agree with you? Never! For you have struck a direct blow at their
intelligence, judgment, pride and self-respect.
That will make them want to strike back. But it will never make them want to change their minds. You may then hurl at them all the logic of a Plato or an Immanuel Kant, but you will not alter
their opinions, for you have hurt their feelings.
If you argue and rankle and contradict, you may achieve a victory sometimes; but it will be an
empty victory because you will never get your opponent's good will.
Get the other person saying "yes, yes" immediately.
You don't feel like smiling? Then what? Two things. First, force yourself to
smile. If you are alone, force yourself to whistle or hum a tune or sing. Act as if you were already happy, and that will tend to make you happy.
Any fool can criticize, condemn and complain - and most fools do. But it takes character and
self-control to be understanding and
forgiving.
You can make more friends in two months by
becoming interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you.
The world is full of people who are grabbing and self-seeking. So the rare individual who
unselfishly tries to serve others has an enormous advantage. He has little competition.
There is a reason why the other man thinks and acts as he does. Ferret out that reason - and you have the key to his actions, perhaps to his personality. Try honestly to
put yourself in his place.
These investigations revealed that even in such technical lines as engineering, about 15 percent of one's financial success is due to one's technical knowledge and about 85 percent is due to
skill in human engineering-to personality and the ability to lead people.
Listen first. Give others a
chance to talk. Let them finish. Do not resist, defend or debate. This only raises barriers. Try to build bridges of understanding.
Even our friends would much rather talk to us about their
achievements than listen to us boast about ours.
Be honest, Look for areas where you can admit error and say so.
Apologize for your mistakes. It will help disarm your opponents and reduce defensiveness.
If we
merely try to impress people and get people interested in us, we will never have many true, sincere friends. Friends, real friends, are not made that way.
Call attention to people's mistakes
indirectly.
It is always easier to listen to unpleasant things after we have heard some
praise of our good points.
Your smile is a messenger of your good will. Your
smile brightens the lives of all who see it. To someone who has seen a dozen people frown, scowl or turn their faces away, your smile is like the sun breaking through the clouds.
Asking questions not only makes an order more palatable; it often stimulates the
creativity of the persons whom you ask. People are more likely to accept an order if they have had a part in the decision that caused the order to be issued.
Merely stating a truth isn't enough. The truth has to be made vivid, interesting, dramatic. You have to use
showmanship.
So, because I had apologized and
sympathized with her point of view, she began apologizing and sympathizing with my point of view, I had the satisfaction of controlling my temper, the satisfaction of returning kindness for an insult.
Do you know someone you would like to change and regulate and improve? Good! That is fine. I am all in favor of it, But why not begin on yourself? From a purely
selfish standpoint, that is a lot more profitable than trying to improve others - yes, and a lot less dangerous.
Criticism is futile because it puts a person on the defensive and usually makes him strive to justify himself.
Criticism is dangerous, because it wounds a person's precious pride, hurts his sense of importance, and arouses resentment.
There's magic, positive magic, in such phrases as: "
I may be wrong. I frequently am. Let's examine the facts."
The
expression one wears on one's face is far more important than the clothes one wears on one's back.
Yet I know and you know people who blunder through life trying to wigwag other people into becoming interested in them. Of course, it doesn't work. People are not interested in you. They are not interested in me. They are
interested in themselves - morning, noon and after dinner.
Let the other person feel that the
idea is his or hers.
I have come to the conclusion that there is only one way under high heaven to get the best of an argument - and that is to
avoid it .
Napoleon the Third, Emperor of France and nephew of the great Napoleon, boasted that in spite of all his royal duties he could remember the
name of every person he met. His technique? Simple. If he didn't hear the name distinctly, he said, "So sorry. I didn't get the name clearly." Then, if it was an unusual name, he would say, "How is it spelled?" During the conversation, he took the trouble to repeat the name several times, and tried to associate it in his mind with the person's features, expression and general appearance.
If we want to make friends, let's put ourselves out to
do things for other people - things that require time, energy, unselfishness and thoughtfulness.
In talking with people, don't begin by discussing the things on which you differ. Begin by emphasizing - and keep on
emphasizing - the things on which you
agree. Keep emphasizing, if possible, that you are both striving for the same end and that your only difference is one of method and not of purpose.
There is a certain degree of satisfaction in having the courage to
admit one's errors.
If we want to make friends, let's
greet people with animation and enthusiasm. When somebody calls you on the telephone use the same psychology. Say "Hello" in tones that bespeak how pleased YOU are to have the person call.
The skillful speaker gets, at the outset, a number of
"Yes" responses. This sets the psychological process of the listeners moving in the affirmative direction.
The
desire for a feeling of importance is one of the chief distinguishing differences between mankind and the animals.
When you are displeased, it is much easier to criticize and condemn than it is to try to understand the other person's viewpoint.
It is more natural to talk about what vou want than to talk about
what the other person wants.
When our friends excel us, they feel important; but when we excel them, they - or at least some of them - will feel inferior and envious.
Tomorrow you may want to persuade somebody to do something. Before you speak, pause and
ask yourself: "How can I make this person want to do it?" That question will stop us from rushing into a situation heedlessly, with futile chatter about our desires.
Courtesy is just as important to a relationship as oil is to your motor.
Make the other person happy about doing the thing you suggest.
Actions speak louder than words, and a smile says, "I like you, You make me happy. I am glad to see you." That is why dogs make such a hit. They are so glad to see us that they almost jump out of their skins. So, naturally, we are glad to see them.
We an
win the attention and time and cooperation of even the most sought-after people by becoming genuinely interested in them.
Begin in a friendly way.
Health is a
prime interest of adults and that their second interest is people.
Could your opponents be right or at least partly right? If there is
truth or merit in their position or argument? admit it.
Consider about a real smile, a heartwarming smile, a smile that comes from within, the kind of smile that will bring a joy in others.
Many companies
train their telephone operatars to greet all callers in a tone of voice that radiates interest and enthusiasm.
Looking at the other person's
point of view and arousing in him an eager want for something is not to be construed as
manipulating that person so that he will do something that is only for your
benefit and his detriment. Each party should gain from the negotiation.
First, arouse in the other person an eager want. He who can do this has the whole world with him. He who cannot walks a lonely way. Said by Harry A. Overstreet
"As I leave for my office, I
greet the elevator operator in the apartment house with a 'Good morning' and a smile, I greet the doorman with a
smile. I smile at the cashier in the subway booth when I ask for change. As I stand on the floor of the Stock Exchange, I smile at people who until recently never saw me smile."
When we have a
brilliant idea, instead of making others think it is ours, why not let them cook and stir the idea themselves.
Read these always,
apply and learn to make them a Habit of your life.
